Don't Give Up

Dear Han,

I miss you so much! I know this is a hard time for you and knowing that you’re emotionally distressed only drives me nuts. I wish I was right beside so that I could hug you tight and assure you that everything will be alright. But I’m so far away from you. I’m sorry. But I never failed to ask God to lighten your load and for you to overcome all the problems and trials you are facing right now. I’m here for you, it may not be physically, but I’m always here for you to hold on when everything is falling apart. 

I know sometimes I've been too hard on you and give you burdens instead of making you happy. Perhaps, I was just torn with the distance between us and the lack of communication sometimes. It pained me knowing that there’s a growing gap between us. Silence kills me. But through silence, I realized how much time and efforts we lose on thinking about what’s wrong than figuring out how to make this relationship work. Perhaps, I’m just over thinking. I’m sorry. 

I love you more than my pride and I know you need me and I need you too. Just always remember that when everything seems to fall apart and there’s no way out, think of me. I may not be the first to be beside you when almost everyone throws their punches on you, but I’ll take the last blow for you. You might fall but these hands will hold you tight, will help you stand and won’t let you go. I still hope and always believe in you. You can overcome this. We can overcome this. Keep on going. Keep on doing your best and never lose your trust in yourself. You can do it! I know…

Let them see that you’re the man… my man whom I will always love. Have faith.

Love,
Gha

A Moment In A Dream

Dearest, it's cold outside
but I cannot hide the warmth I feel inside.
You are here beside me and I felt at peace;
the happiness you bring I just cannot resist.  

Darling, please hold my hand
assure me that this special moment will never end.
Wrap your arms around me
let your heartbeat feel mine.

Let your breath caress my soul
like I am yours and you are mine.
Kiss my lips, close your eyes
while we dream of Neverland. 

Just hold on and never let go,
we will make this night a dream come true. 

A reply to the "Man who can't be moved"

Standing in the corner where I last saw you
In the place where longing hearts meet and drift apart.
Searching for the familiar face I left behind
Faith and hope for the man who can't be moved.

Eagerly, I reached for someone with his sleeping bag
Just realizing it wasn't you I had found
Almost crying, I asked the stranger,
"Do you know a man who's waiting for his girl?"
Looking at his blank face, my heart broke.
The man I loved has already moved.

Coz, one day I woke up and found that I'm missing you
And my heart started to wonder where on this earth you could be
I was unhappy when I left you and fulfilled my dream without you
Thought I will see you waiting for me in this corner of the street
But now you're nowhere
Yet I'm not moving.

Got your picture on my hand, asked a couple if they've seen this man
Whom I've longed to see for a day, a month, a year.
Hope has spark that somehow you've been here
I won't move till you find out that I come back just for you.

I heared people talked about a guy who waited for his girl
And now I cannot find the whole of me again

Maybe you just got tired of waiting and not moving
Or maybe you started to search on the other side of the world
But I hope you knew that my heart only wanders for you
Coz I'm the girl who yearns for her love
For the man who can't be moved.

Going back to the corner where I first saw you
There you are standing on the other side of the road waiting and not moving...

I was just inspired of the song of The Script and the special person who sang this to me. You know I love you right? We are strong and we'll be moving together. 

Magkaibang Dimensyon: Paghihintay

Andiyan ka pa ba? Sana ay naririnig mo ako ngayon kahit nasa ibang dimensyon ka. 

Kasama pa rin ba ako sa mundong iyong ginagalawan o isa na lamang akong projection ng isang mundong nais mong makamtan? Nakapagtataka kung paano tayo nananatiling magkaugnay kahit na magkaiba na ang ating dimensyong kinabibilangan. Habang ako ay nakikipagbuno sa kasalukuyan, andiyan ka pa rin at nananatili sa aking nakaraan. Kailan ba natin makakamtan ang hinihiling ng ating mga puso na tayo ay magkasama? Gaano ba kabilis o katagal ang minimithi nating panghinaharap para sa ating dalawa? Ang hirap ng ganitong sitwasyon! Nandito ako habang nandiyan ka pa rin. Habang ako ay umuusad, pakiramdam ko palayo ka naman ng palayo sa akin. Kailan ka ba makakaabot? Kailan ba tayo magkakasama? Masakit malaman na hindi na ako naaangkop sa mundong iyong ginagalawan kahit nga ba nanggaling na ako diyan. 

Marami na ang nagbago na hindi natin maiwasan. Alam kong mali pero hindi ko maiwasang itanong sa aking sarili kung parte pa rin ba ako ng iyong kaligayahan? Kaligayahan na dati rati ay buong buo nating ibinabahagi sa isa't isa. Subali't ngayon tila ba pilit na lang ipinararamdam sa bawat isa ang salitang "masaya". Kung hindi tampuhan, puro away ang ating ginagawa. Bihira na nga lang tayong magkita, at sa tuwing tayo'y magkausap hindi pa maiwasang makapagbitaw ng masasakit na salita sa bawat isa. Bakit? Ano na ba ang nangyari sa dati ay matamis na pagsasama? Marahil ako ang may problema, di ba? Ako na lang palagi ang nagsisimula ng away nating dalawa. Bakit ba hindi ko maiwasang masaktan habang nakikita kitang masaya sa piling ng iba, habang ako ay heto at nag-iisa at naghihintay saiyo? Nasasaktan ako dahil dati rati ay sa akin mo lamang inilalaan ang matatamis mong ngiti at tawa na sa akin ay nagpapasaya. Sa akin mo lamang noon ibinabahagi ang iyong mga pangarap, takot at problema, subali't ngayon tila ba hindi na lang ako ang tanging nag-iisa diyan sa puso mo. At para nga bang hirap ka ng sabihin ang iyong nararamdaman. O, ako nga lang ba talaga ang may problema? Masyado ba akong makasarili? At kahit sinasabi kong masaya ako na nakikita kang masaya, bakit nasasaktan pa rin ako na makita kang masaya sa piling ng iba? O, natatakot lang ba ako na dumating ang araw na hindi na ako ang pinakamahigit na rason kung bakit ka maligaya? Mahal naman kita pero bakit hindi mawala ang aking takot at pangamba? Marahil hindi na tayo katulad ng dati kung saan magkasama tayo sa iisang mundo na ating binuo para lamang sa ating dalawa. At ang tangi ko na lamang magagawa ay ang manalig at magtiwala na ako pa rin ang nagbibigay saiyo ng inspirasyon para mabuo mo ang iyong sariling mundo upang kapag dumating ang panahon na tayo'y muling magkasama buong buo mo ng maibabahagi sa akin ang iyong sarili.

Ngayon, kailangan ko munang tanggapin ang katotohanan na hindi ito ang tamang oras para tayo ay magkasama. Hahayaan na muna kitang manatili saiyong dimensyon, habang ako ay naghihintay na dumating ang panahon na ikaw ay makarating dito at tayo ay magkapiling sa isang bagong mundong ating bubuuin panghabangbuhay para lamang sa atin.